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Jokes are not bad

Discussion in 'The Big Adda' started by prototype, Jun 14, 2010.

  1. Praveen Taneja

    Praveen Taneja 2nd Lieutant FULL MEMBER

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    Santa : Marte waqt aadmi ko kya dena chahiye?

    Banta :Birla white cement.

    Santa : kyon?

    Banta : Kyonki is cement mein jaan hai.
     
  2. Praveen Taneja

    Praveen Taneja 2nd Lieutant FULL MEMBER

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    a baby who drinks elephant milk gained 10 kg wt in
    one week.
    oh my god who he was
    .
    .
    .
    baby elephant :haha:
     
  3. ManuSankar

    ManuSankar Major SENIOR MEMBER

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    The crazy Italian Prime minister Berlusconi



    Can't believe it right,its Italian PM Silvio Berlusconi for you.

    [​IMG]

    He is infamous for the sex scandals that recently rocked Italy.Wonder why are they keeping him as their PM.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 12, 2014
  4. Praveen Taneja

    Praveen Taneja 2nd Lieutant FULL MEMBER

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    Bro can you step by step post how to post youtube and images at this forum?????
     
  5. ManuSankar

    ManuSankar Major SENIOR MEMBER

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    1.Copy the Image/video url.(For youtube its shown on top of the browser).Image url can be accessed by right clicking on image and go to view image info(in Mozilla only)
    2.go to quick reply,there are video/image tabs at top right corner.
    3.click it,paste the url there,and click ok.
     
    1 person likes this.
  6. Manmohan Yadav

    Manmohan Yadav Brigadier STAR MEMBER

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    That crazy old Man :rofl:
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 12, 2014
  7. Praveen Taneja

    Praveen Taneja 2nd Lieutant FULL MEMBER

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  8. Praveen Taneja

    Praveen Taneja 2nd Lieutant FULL MEMBER

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    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 12, 2014
  9. Praveen Taneja

    Praveen Taneja 2nd Lieutant FULL MEMBER

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    Got that now thnx
     
  10. ManuSankar

    ManuSankar Major SENIOR MEMBER

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    No problemo...
     
  11. DaRk KnIght

    DaRk KnIght Lt. Colonel ELITE MEMBER

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    A certain rich businessperson had a beautiful daughter, who fell in love with a guy who was a cleaner. When the girl's father came to know about their love, he did not like it at all, and so began to protest about it.

    Now, the two lovers decided to leave their homes for a happy future.

    The girl's father started searching for the two lovers but could not find them. At last, he accepted their love and asked them to come back home thru a local newspaper. Her father said, "If you both come back I will allow you to marry the guy you love, I accept that you loved each other truly."

    Therefore, in this way, their love won and they returned home.

    The couple next day went to town to shop for the wedding dress. He was dressed in a white shirt that day. While he was crossing the road to the other side to get some drinks for his wife, suddenly from the next corner, a lorry came at a fantastic speed and hit him. He died on the spot.

    The girl was devastated and lost her senses. It was only after sometime that
    she recovered from her shock. The funeral and cremation was the next day because he had died horribly.

    Father felt very sad for his daughter. He told his daughter, "See, This is all divine will. I know I should not be talking to you so soon. However, I cannot bear the pathetic sight of you like this for the rest of my life. I beg you; please try to come out of this sorrow. I want you to marry again and live happily forever. My partner's son is willing to marry you." The girl, who was already so sad, now felt sorry for her father also.

    Two nights later, the girl's mother had a dream in which she saw an old lady. The old lady asked her mother to wash the bloodstains of the guy from her daughter's dress as soon as possible. But her mother ignored the dream.

    The next night her father had the same dream, he also ignored it. Then the
    girl had the same dream the next night; she woke up in fear and told her mother about the dream. Her mother asked her to wash the clothes with the bloodstains immediately.

    She washed the stains but some remained. Next night she again had the same dream. She again washed the stains but some remained. But again, the next night she had the same dream and this time the old lady gave her a last warning to wash the bloodstain, or else something terrible would happen.

    This time the girl tried her best to wash the stains, and the clothes nearly tore, but some stains remained. She was very tired.

    In the late evening the same day while she was alone at home, someone knocked on the door. When she opened the door, she saw the same old lady of her dream standing at her door. Her face was pale. She seemed to be half asleep or in a trance. The girl got very scared and fainted. And slowly she slipped, and slipped down to a bottomless pit. She lost any idea of time.

    The old lady woke her up. She gave her a blue object, which shocked the girl.

    She asked the old lady, "What is this...?"

    The old lady started singing in unbelievably melodious semi divine voice.
    *
    *
    *
    "Washing powder Nirma, Washing powder Nirma
    Doodh si safedi Nirma se aaye,
    Rangeen kapde bhi khil khil jaye,
    Washing powder Nirma, Washing powder Nirma. Nirma"

    10 ka 1, do pe. ek free

    The girl bought two and got one free!
    *
    *
    *
    Hey, I know how you all are feeling now. Promise, this story is not mine ya...
    Don't get mad ya ... Don't hunt for me ya...
    Just for Fun ya :lol:
     
  12. Praveen Taneja

    Praveen Taneja 2nd Lieutant FULL MEMBER

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    Five surgeons are discussing who are the best patients to operate on. The first surgeon says, "I like to see accountants on my operating table, because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered."
    The second responds, "Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is color coded."
    The third surgeon says, "No, I really think librarians are the best; everything inside them is in alphabetical order."
    The fourth surgeon chimes in: "You know, I like construction workers...those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end and when the job takes longer than you said it would."
    But the fifth surgeon shut them all up when he observed: "You're all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart, no balls, no brains and no spine, and the head and the a$$ are interchangeable.
     
  13. DaRk KnIght

    DaRk KnIght Lt. Colonel ELITE MEMBER

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    मौसी लड़का Engineer है ...
    मौसी: हाय राम .. कुछ और नहीं मिला करने को ?
    जय :कहाँ मौसी B.Tech करने के बाद कोई अच्छी कंपनी लेती कहाँ है ..
    मौसी :है है तो क्या B.Tech. भी किया है
    जय :हाँ मौसी .. सोचा था B. Tech. करके अच्छी जगह नोकरी मिल जायेगी ..
    मौसी :ये B.Tech क्या होता है बेटा ..?
    जय : मौसी ये 'बेरोजगार इंजिनियर' बनने के लिए चार साल का कोर्से होता हे जहाँ पढाई के अलावा हर वो काम होता हें जिसके लिए टीचर और घरवाले मना करते हें ..
    मौसी: डिग्री तो मिलती होगी न बेटा ?
    जय : कहाँ मौसी डिग्री तो बहुत दूर ... रिजल्ट का ही पता नही होता हें
    मौसी :पेपर्स तो छपते होंगे ना उसके ?
    जय : हाँ मोसी पर University वी तो Engineers की हें ना .
    मौसी : हाय राम.. बस यही एक कमी बाकि थी..तो क्या university भी राम भरोसे हें ?
    जय : ना मोसी वो तो हर बार फीस टाइम पे लेती हें ... बस बस डिग्री का पता नहीं
    मौसी: अछा बेटा लड़का पढाई में केसा हें
    जय :बस मोसी पुछो मत हर बार लिस्ट में टॉप मरता हें निचे से..
    मौसी :तो क्या अब तक 1 भी बार पास नही हुआ
    जय :वो तो है .पर कभी कभी पास भी हो जाता है
    मौसी : इसके बाद क्या करेगा ?
    जय : अब मौसी एक बार बसंती से शादी हो जाये तो कमाने वी लगेगा ..
    मौसी:एक बात की दाद दूंगी बेटा भले लाख बुराई हो तुमारे दोस्त में पर तुम्हारे मुह से तारीफ ही निकलती हें ..
    जय :अब क्या करू मोसी मेरा तो दिल ही कुछ ऐसा हें ..में भी तो Engineer ही हु ना..
    जय : तो मैं रिश्ता पक्का समझू मौसी
    मौसी:बेटा , कान खोल के सुन ले , सगी मौसी हूँ बसंती की,सौतेली माँ नही , चाहे
    बसंती चपरासी चंदू से शादी कर ले पर B.Tech वाले के साथ नहीं करेगी ..........
    खाली दिमाग शेतान का घर होता हें ...
     
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  14. Naren1987

    Naren1987 Captain SENIOR MEMBER

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    Amul looking like a homo in this pic

    [​IMG]
     
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  15. jack

    jack FULL MEMBER

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